Saturday, January 5, 2013

The whole house is vibrating.  The blinds are gently tap-tapping on the windowsill, the main light in the living room is swaying, and there's a loud rattling coming from the floor.  Wherever you go in the house, you can feel the vibration.  No, it's not an earthquake.  It's a daily occurrence - at least it is, when everyone is home.  In other words, the washing machine is spinning, and as it spins, the whole house moves.  It's so normal, it's not even annoying any more.

There are only three dining chairs at the dining room table.  Why?  Well, there's one in the garage, downstairs, minus two legs, and there are two out on the porch, that no one has bothered to bring back inside.  And WHY doesn't anyone unload the dishwasher?  The bins are due on Thursday... oh wait, it's Sunday, I think we forgot again - which reminds me, someone needs to dismantle the Christmas Tree at some stage.  It's not going to be me, because I'm far too busy blogging, drinking soda, and doing the least amount possible - although unfortunately that does involve ironing my uniform.  Now that S is working, I guess I can't really expect her to want to iron for money.

Here's another thing.  Australian ants do not like ant bait.  Neither does ant poison kill them for very long.  One minute they're dead, and the next minute they're running around again.  I'm convinced of this, because that ant over there looks exactly the same as the ant I sprayed five minutes ago.  And would someone PLEASE unload the dishwasher ?!!  On the subject of ants, I wonder whether macbooks overheat if ants are running around in their internal workings?  Mine seems to get quite warm, and if the ants which appear magically from under random keys are are anything to go by, there's probably an entire nest underneath.

People.  There are NO clean spoons.  Well, there are, but they're all in the dishwasher, and I'm not unloading it.  FINE, I'll unload One Spoon.  See?  I helped!

Two hours until I report.  That is one hour and fifteen minutes left before I need to leave the house.  That is forty-five minutes of youtube, ten minutes of lunch, five minutes of wondering-where-to-put-my-dirty-dishes-because-nobody-unloaded-the-dishwasher and fifteen minutes of frantic panicking because I didn't get ready for work yet.  Nice to be so organised, huh?

I don't have any photos.  I'm really sorry, folks, but when you spend two whole days watching movies, TV shows and random youtube clips, there isn't really anything to take a photo of.  Sorry, dangling preposition.  My bad.  Okay, I didn't just square-ify my eyes, I also went grocery shopping and bought ant bait stations and ant poison which the ants don't even like and they're STILL IN MY KEYBOARD!  No, I didn't put an ant bait station in my keyboard, but I did put one next to my laptop under the couch!  I know, it's weird.  Yes, I do keep my laptop under the couch.  This is mainly due to the fact that we don't often lock the front door, and I figure a neon pink laptop in full view is soo tempting to a wannabe burglar.

Right, well that's all for now, as now I have less than two hours until I report, and I need to go into the kitchen and Find A Spoon.  As you do.  Oh, and just so you know, the house isn't rattling any more, so the laundry must be finished!


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